Frology!

Arthur Ashe, the legendary Wimbledon player was dying of AIDS which he got due to infected blood he received during a heart surgery in 1983. From world over, he received letters from his fans, one of which conveyed: “Why does GOD have to select you for such a bad disease”?

To this Arthur Ashe replied: The world over — 50,000,000 children start playing tennis, 5,000,000 learn to play tennis, 500,000 learn professional tennis, 50,000 come to the circuit, 5000 reach the grand slam, 50 reach Wimbledon, 4 to semi final, 2 to the finals, When I was holding a cup I never asked GOD “Why me?”. And today in pain I should not be asking GOD “Why me?”

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1) Tech Support: “I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.”
Customer: “Ok.”
Tech Support: “Did you get a pop-up menu?”
Customer: “No.”
Tech Support: “Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?”
Customer: “No.”
Tech Support:: “Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until
this point?”
Customer: “Sure, you told me to write ‘click’ and I wrote ‘click’.”
2) Customer: “I received the software update you sent, but I am still
getting the same error message.”
Tech Support:: “Did you install the update?”
Customer: “No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?”
3).Customer: : “I’m having trouble installing Microsoft Word.”
Tech Support:: “Tell me what you’ve done.”
Customer: “I typed ‘A:SETUP’.”
Tech Support:: “Ma’am, remove the disk and tell me what it says.”
Customer:: “It says ‘[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk’.”
Tech Support:: “Insert the MS Word setup disk.”
Customer:: “What?”
Tech Support: “Did you buy MS word?”
Customer: “No…”
4).Customer: : “Do I need a computer to use your software?”
Tech Support:: ?!%#$
5).Tech Support:: “Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen, can
you see the ‘OK’ button displayed?”
Customer: “Wow. How can you see my screen from there?”
6) Tech Support:: “What type of computer do you have?”
Customer:: “A white one.”
7). Tech Support:: “Type ‘A:’ at the prompt.”
Customer:: “How do you spell that?”
8). Tech Support: “What’s on your screen right now?”
Customer: “A stuffed animal that my boyfriend got me at the grocery
store.”
9). Tech Support:: “What operating system are you running?”
Customer: “Pentium.”
10). Customer: “My computer’s telling me I performed an illegal
abortion.”

11).Customer: “I have Microsoft Exploder.”

12).Customer: “How do I print my voicemail?”

13). Customer: “You’ve got to fix my computer. I urgently need to print
document, but the computer won’t boot properly.”
Tech Support: “What does it say?”
Customer: “Something about an error and non-system disk.”
Tech Support: “Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?”
Customer: “No, but there’s a sticker saying there’s an Intel inside.”

14). Tech Support: “Just call us back if there’s a problem. We’re open 24 hours.”
Customer: “Is that Eastern time?”

15). Tech Support:: “What does the screen say now?”
Customer: “It says, ‘Hit ENTER when ready’.”
Tech Support:: “Well?”
Customer: “How do I know when it’s ready?”

16). A plain computer illiterate guy rings tech support to report that is computer is faulty.
Tech: What’s the problem?
User: There is smoke coming out of the power supply.
Tech: You’ll need a new power supply.
User: No, I don’t! I just need to change the startup files.
Tech: Sir, the power supply is faulty. You’ll need to replace it.
User: No way! Someone told me that I just needed to change the startup and it will fix the problem! All I need is for you to tell me the command.
10 minutes later, the User is still adamant that he is right. The tech is frustrated and fed up.
Tech: Sorry, Sir. We don’t normally tell our customers this, but there is an undocumented DOS command that will fix the problem.
User: I knew it!
Tech: Just add the line LOAD NOSMOKE.COM at the end of the CONFIG.SYS. Let me know how it goes.
10 minutes later.
User: It didn’t work. The power supply is still smoking.
Tech: Well, what version of DOS are you using?
User: MS-DOS 6.22.
Tech: That’s your problem there. That version of DOS didn’t come with NOSMOKE. Contact Microsoft and ask them for a patch that will give you the file. Let me know how it goes.
1 hour later.
User: I need a new power supply.
Tech: How did you come to that conclusion?
User: Well, I rang Microsoft and told him about what you said, and he started asking questions about the make of power supply.
Tech: Then what did he say?
User: He told me that my power supply isn’t compatible with NOSMOKE.

17) customer care officer:I need a product identification no: right now and may I help u in finding it out?
Cust: sure
CCO: could u left click on start and do u find ‘My Computer’?
Cust: I did left click but how the hell do I find your computer?

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Sometimes, we think of why friends keep forwarding emails to us without writing a word, maybe this could explain why.

When you have nothing to say,
But still want to keep in touch,
Guess what you do?
You forward emails!

When you have something to say,
But don’t know what,
But don’t know how,
Guess what you do?
You forward emails!
When you have something to say,
But don’t know why,
Guess what you do?
You forward emails!
When you are still wanted,
When you are still remembered,
When you are still important,
When you are still loved,
When you are still cared,
Guess what you get?
A forwarded email!

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Mother-in-law
INDIA – A woman capable of making your life miserable.

OVERSEAS – A woman you never fight with, because where else you will find such a dedicated baby sitter for free?

Husband
INDIA – A boring human species, who listens more to his mother than you, and orders you around to serve him, his parents and siblings.

OVERSEAS – Still boring, but now a useful human species that comes in handy when the house needs to be vacuumed.

Friend
INDIA – A person whose house you can drop into any time of the day or night and you’ll always be welcome.

OVERSEAS – A person whom you have to call first to check and make sure he is not busy.

Wife
INDIA – A woman who gives you your underwear and towel when you go to take a shower.

OVERSEAS – A woman who yells at you not to leave tub dirty when you go to take bath.

Son
INDIA – A teenager, who without asking will carry your grocery bags from the market.

OVERSEAS – A teenager, who suddenly remembers he has lot of homework when you start mowing the lawn.

Daughter
INDIA – A lovely doll, who brings tears to your eyes during her marriage.

OVERSEAS – A lovely doll, who brings you to tears long before her marriage.

Father
INDIA – A person you are afraid of, and who is never to be disobeyed .

OVERSEAS – A person to whom you pretend to obey, after all he is the one paying your college tuition.

Indian Engineer
INDIA – A person with a respectable job and earning lots.

OVERSEAS – A person without a secure job, who always dreams one day he will be rich.

Doctor
INDIA – A respectable person with OK income.

OVERSEAS – A money making machine, who has a money spending machine at home called “doctor’s wife”.

Bhangra
INDIA – A vigorous Punjabi festival dance.

OVERSEAS – A dance you do, when you don’t know how to dance.

Software Engineer
INDIA – A high-tech guy, always speaks in American accent, always anxious to queue in the consulate visa line.

OVERSEAS – The same hi-tech guy, who does Ganapati Puja everyday, and says ‘This is my last year in the US (or wherever) every year.

A Green Card holder bachelor
INDIA – the guy can’t speak Hindi, parents of good looking girls are dying to hook him, wears jacket in summer, says he has a BMW back there.

OVERSEAS – the guy can’t speak proper English, wears jacket all the time, works in a Candy store at Manhattan, dreams of owning

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Its very interesting ……Give it a try! Open Microsoft Word and type following:

=rand (200,99)

And then press ENTER.

This is something pretty weird! Worth a check! Try it!

At Microsoft the whole team couldn’t answer why this happened and they add a prize of $1,00,000 to the person who could answer this…

Bill Gates still doesn’t know why it happens, it was discovered by a Brazilian. Just test it..

<blockquote>I tried it in Microsoft Word 2007 and it resulted in 565 pages of nonsensical text. I think it gets the text from a help file or some place.</blockquote>

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If you are good in lateral thinking, then you can be a good strategic thinker or… be a part of Think Tank. Here is an interesting quiz to test your Lateral Thinking abilities — Think!

1. There is a man who lives on the top floor of a very tall building. Everyday he gets the elevator down to the ground floor to leave the building to go to work. Upon returning from work though, he can only travel half way up in the lift and has to walk the rest of the way unless it’s raining! Why?

(This is probably the best known and most celebrated of all lateral thinking puzzles. It is a true classic. Although there are many possible solutions which fit the initial conditions, only the canonical answer is truly satisfying.)

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

2. A man and his son are in a car accident. The father dies on the scene, but the child is rushed to the hospital. When he arrives the surgeon says, “I can’t operate on this boy, he is my son!” How can this be?

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

3. A man is wearing black. Black shoes, socks, trousers, lumper, gloves and balaclava. He is walking down a black street with all the street lamps off. A black car is coming towards him with its light off but somehow
manages to stop in time. How did the driver see the man?

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

4. Why is it better to have round manhole covers than square ones? This is logical rather than lateral, but it is a good puzzle that can be solved by lateral thinking techniques. It is supposedly used by a very well-known software company as an interview question for prospective employees.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

5. A man went to a party and drank some of the punch. He then left early. Everyone else at the party who drank the punch subsequently died of poisoning. Why did the man not die?

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

6. A man walks into a bar and asks the barman for a glass of water. The barman pulls out a gun and points it at the man. The man says ‘Thank you’ and walks out. (This puzzle claims to be the best of the genre. It is simple in its statement, absolutely baffling and yet with a completely satisfying solution. Most people struggle very hard to solve this one yet they like the answer when they hear it or have the satisfaction of figuring it out.)

Click here for solutions

More »

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All good things come to those who wait.
BUT
Time and tide wait for no man.

The pen is mightier than the sword.
BUT
Actions speak louder than words.

Wise men think alike.
BUT
Fools seldom differ.

he best things in life are free
BUT
There’s no such thing as a free lunch

low and steady wins the race
BUT
Time waits for no man

ook before you leap
BUT
Strike while the iron is hot

o it well, or not at all.
BUT
Half a loaf is better than none.

Birds of a feather flock together.
BUT
Opposites attract.

Don’t cross your bridges before you come to them.
BUT
Forewarned is forearmed.

Doubt is the beginning of wisdom.
BUT
Faith will move mountains.

Great starts make great finishes.
BUT
It ain’t over ’till it’s over.

Practice makes perfect.
BUT
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

Silence is golden.
BUT
The squeaky wheel gets the grease.

You’re never too old to learn.
BUT
You can’t teach an old dog new tricks

What’s good for the goose is good for the gander.
BUT
One man’s meat is another man’s poison.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
BUT
Out of sight, out of mind.

Too many cooks spoil the broth.
BUT
Many hands make light work.

Hold fast to the words of your ancestors.
BUT
Wise men make proverbs and fools repeat them.

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Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.

Follow the three res. Respect for self, Respect for others, and Responsibility for all your actions.

Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.

Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.

Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

Spend some time alone every day.

Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.

Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.

A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.

In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.

Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality.

Be gentle with the earth.

Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.

Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.

Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.

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Missed the earlier parts?

Trivial Trivia! (I)
Trivial Trivia! (II)

Most soccer players run 7 miles in a game.

The only part of the body that has no blood supply is the cornea in the eye. It takes in oxygen directly from the air.

Every day 200 million couples make love, 400,000 babies are born, and 140,000 people die.

In most watch advertisements the time displayed on the watch is 10:10 because then the arms frame the brand of the watch (and make it look like it is smiling.)

Colgate faced big obstacle marketing toothpaste in Spanish speaking countries. Colgate translates into the command “go hang yourself.”

The only 2 animals that can see behind itself without turning its head are the rabbit and the parrot.

Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

The average person laughs 13 times a day.

Do you know the names of the three wise monkeys? They are: Mizaru(See no evil), Mikazaru(Hear no evil), and Mazaru(Speak no evil)

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

German Shepherds bite humans more than any other breed of dog.

Large kangaroos cover more than 30 feet with each jump.

Whip makes a cracking sound because its tip moves faster than the speed of sound.

Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn. Suddenly the pigs, all two thousand of them, escaped through a broken fence and stampeded, trampling the two hapless protesters to death.

If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle; if the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle; if the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural cause.

The human heart creates enough pressure while pumping to squirt blood 30 feet!!

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Continued from: Trivial Trivia! (I)

The color blue has a calming effect. It causes the brain to release calming hormones.

Every time you sneeze some of your brain cells die.

Your left lung is smaller than your right lung to make room for your heart.

The verb “cleave” is the only English word with two synonyms which are antonyms of each other: adhere and separate.

When you blush, the lining of your stomach also turns red.

When Hippos are upset, their sweat turns red.

The first Harley Davidson motorcycle was built in 1903, and used a tomato can for a carburetor.

The lion that roars in the MGM logo is named Volney.

Google is actually the common name for a number with a million zeros.

Switching letters is called spoonerism. For example, saying “jag of Flapan”, instead of “flag of Japan”.

It cost 7 million dollars to build the Titanic and 200 million to make a film about it.

The attachment of the human skin to muscles is what causes dimples.

There are 1,792 steps to the top of the Eiffel Tower.

The sound you hear when you crack your knuckles is actually the sound of nitrogen gas bubbles bursting.

Human hair and fingernails continue to grow after death.

It takes about 20 seconds for a red blood cell to circle the whole body.

The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.

Continues here: Trivial Trivia! (III)

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